You Grow Old Beautifully

I'm blogging because Casey won't leave me alone about it. I'm not going to tell him I'm updating either. Wonder how long it will take him to see it.

The proverbial bookshelf can be rearranged quite rapidly. If you had asked me two weeks ago when the next time I would date someone would be, I would've laughed at you. I either heal quickly, or somewhere, deep down, I knew it was going to happen. I feel like in all my relationships so far I've just gotten to a point where I'm done. Does that stop happening if you find the one? I'm not sure if I know the difference between comfort and love after a while. Or maybe I just hate change enough that I'm willing to be slightly unhappy in order to be comfortable.

I'm afraid to tell people. I'm afraid to put it out there. It's been so little time. As much as he hurt me, I don't want to hurt him. I don't want him to think he meant nothing to me. But there is no control. I have no control over what happens in my brain.

It's really quite amazing how one person can make you feel so complete in so many ways that are completely different from the ways another person made you feel complete.

For now, I am content. No, I'm more than content. I'm happy. I will take it. This past year has been a whirlwind of emotions for me. I was floating.

Now I feel anchored.